Anger is a natural human emotion, which can range from feeling mild irritation to full blown rage. Anger is normal after a bereavement but not something that everybody will experience.
In the realm of grief, there’s no universal right or wrong way to respond. Each individual’s reaction is uniquely personal and often beyond our immediate control. Grieving individuals may find themselves grappling with anger for various reasons—things that were done or left undone, words spoken or left unsaid, the inherent injustice of the situation, or sometimes, for reasons we cannot put words to.
While expressing anger can be a healthy outlet, it’s crucial to approach it with mindfulness. The way we express our anger holds the potential for unintended negative consequences. Balancing the need to address challenging situations with a thoughtful expression of anger ensures a more constructive navigation through the complexities of grief.
Anger tends to have three components:
A physical reaction
The cognitive experience of anger
Behaviour
Anger is more than just an emotional sensation; it’s also a biological process. At its peak, anger triggers a surge of adrenaline, an elevated heart rate, increased blood pressure, muscle tightening, and overall bodily tension.
This pertains to the ‘thoughts’ aspect of the emotion. Anger commonly emerges from our interpretation of something said or done (or left unsaid or undone). Our emotional response is frequently triggered by these perceptions.
This represents how we manifest our anger, ranging from elevated voices to breaking objects. While there might be moments when smashing a plate feels necessary, it’s crucial to recognise that acting on anger can often exacerbate negative feelings about ourselves.
Please remember that the effectiveness of these strategies may vary from person to person, so it’s valuable to explore and find what works best for you.
Resources to support you
When we bottle up grief, the pressure builds in the pipes and eventually we burst. That could manifest as sleeplessness, irritability, relationship difficulties. Give yourself the time for grief outlets.
