If you’ve lost your mum you’ll only be too aware that celebrations like birthdays and Christmases are stark reminders of your mum’s absence. Mother’s Day can loom large on the calendar as an empty space whilst your friends take their mums out for lunch and shops, and brands up their marketing ante as you scramble frantically to opt out of as many email marketing campaigns as possible.
We’ve compiled a list that we hope will help you navigate Mother’s Day.
1. Do what feels right for you
Like with Christmas, everybody will have different feelings about their loss – and the day itself. You may want to be surrounded by those you love or you might want to have some time on your own. There is no right or wrong way to react but listen to your emotions and don’t feel pressured by anybody else.
🌱 Grow with our courses
Explore our courses – including Mental Health: Supporting Ourselves and the Grief Journey Workbook – on our dedicated Grief & Mental Health Training page.
2. Take a break from social media
Instagram may be full of mother’s day algorithms but take a break from your phone and spend the day reading a book or watching a movie instead.
3. Reach out for support
If you are struggling with your loss (at whatever stage of grief you are in) there are many organisations out there that can help. You can join our facebook parent loss to cancer group (a supportive forum that’s always open) or sign up to events on our website calendar if you are affected by cancer or covid loss.
We have a parent loss to cancer support group next on Thursday 28th March, 2024.
We will also be holding a Walk and Talk for parent loss to cancer on Sunday 10th March, 2024 in Hampstead Heath.
At A Loss are a national signposting agency that can point you in the right direction of many helpful, useful organisations.
4. Talk about your mum
Talking really can help. Get out the photograph album and share your memories of your mum. Cry, laugh and connect with those who knew and loved her.
5. Celebrate your mum’s memory
If it feels right then mark the day by doing something your mum would have loved. Plant a tree in her memory, write a note or light a candle.
6. Feel the emotions
You may feel lots of different emotions as Mother’s Day comes round: this all depends on factors such as your relationship, how you lost your mum and how far along you are in your journey. Grief is an individual experience, but on our website, you’ll find some information on common bereavement experiences and how to support yourself in them.
As Mother’s Day comes round it can feel pretty overwhelming but remember to look after yourself and do exactly what feels right for you.
Photo by Pin Adventure Map on Unsplash
🧠 Understand the ‘Stages’ of Grief
The idea of “stages” is one of the most widely recognised ways people make sense of grief – but it’s often misunderstood.
Our Stages of Grief page explains where the model came from, what the stages really mean, and how they can help (without implying grief follows a neat, linear path).
Explore the page to learn:
📘 What the Five Stages really are (and aren’t)
🧭 Why grief doesn’t follow a straight line
🌊 How emotions can come in waves
🧩 How different grief models may help you